Techno Rants About Ratchet And Clank

[Techno]

I've been wanting to rant about this game for a while now, and I finally have the brain cells to do it. Without further ado: Why I hate Ratchet And Clank 2016 with a burning passion.

Imagine for a moment that you are at a fish market, wanting to buy a lovely salmon, you already enjoyed this certain type of salmon, you could even say your a fan of the salmon, and when you buy the salmon, you end with a long strip of meat, this meat is not a full fish, it's a slice of meat that has a tapeworm solved into it because the fish seller wanted to sell more tuna, and so sabotaged the salmon.

Ratchet and Clank means a lot to me, mainly because it's a edgy, atmospheric game about gunning down robots and aliens. The 2016 has none of that, and is rather the cheap ripoff version that would have been sold in a back alley. For starters, they gutted out nearly half of the game, this is a spit to the face of people who's favorite level was Eudora, and was deeply wanting to see it in modern day graphics.

To show just how many levels they gutted here is a list of levels they took out:

Eudora

Umbris

Battalia (Techically they turned it into a snow level, and removed the NPCs in it)

Orxon

Hoven

Oltanis Orbit

Oltanis

Quartu (They changed it to the point that it's a different level)

Veldin Orbit

Veldin (Changed it to the point of it being different)

As you can you about half of the game is missing from the 2016 version, every one of these levels was destryoed in favor of a poopy movie tie in game. That's right, not only did they tear my boy Eudora away from me, but they shoved in the 2016 movie that's entirely forgettable.

Besides the blatant attempt to brainwash me into watching a wet sponge, they also assassinated Ratchet and turned him into a plushie. Ratchet is not meant to be a plushie, that's Clanks job, Rachel meant to be mean, for example his greatest line is when he sees a plumber bending over and says "Hey Look plumbers crack". He also argued with Clank constantly, which was a nice change of pace for the buddy duo trope. But in 2016 they don't even speak to each other. Another problem is how badly the ruined the atmosphere,  there are barely any characters in the game. A long shot from the wide cast of greedy pigs, and dimwitted bulbs that once was apart of the worlds. Ratchet was a great satire of greed, capitalism, and monopolies, something that would have angered Sony today. Also they destroyed the soundtrack, some of the best Techno music of all time, and replaced it with boring music that would be great for sleep medication.

In conclusion, RIP Eudora.

[Kane99]

I've never played a Ratchet and Clank game myself. Always been a big fan of the Jak and Daxter games, and always went after those games. Honestly, Ratchet and Clank was something I never really cared to try out. But that's just me. I probably missed out on a lot of good games. 

[Techno]

Just now, Kane99 said:

 I probably missed out on a lot of good games. 

I guess, but I lost interest on the series after the second game, the first two are basically the only ones I love, and the third one is okay. The rest get toned down which is when I start hating them.

[Kane99]

27 minutes ago, Techno said:

I guess, but I lost interest on the series after the second game, the first two are basically the only ones I love, and the third one is okay. The rest get toned down which is when I start hating them.

Ah okay. Yeah I heard the newer games kinda took a lot away. Didn't the first few games have tons of weapons that you could alter and change? Or was that one of the later titles? 

[Techno]

36 minutes ago, Kane99 said:

Ah okay. Yeah I heard the newer games kinda took a lot away. Didn't the first few games have tons of weapons that you could alter and change? Or was that one of the later titles? 

That the latter titles, but they take away the soundtrack, the astophere and the arguments between the duo. It's why I fell off from the series.