killamch89 Posted June 29, 2021 Share Posted June 29, 2021 Use your imagination for this one - we really want some wild ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality vs Adventure Posted June 29, 2021 Share Posted June 29, 2021 Headaches- use leaches on your head to relieve the blood pressure Headaches- Inhaling helium balloons can relieve the pressure Headaches- Suck on peppermints upside down to clear your head Headaches- Magnetic necklace to increase blood flow-might even be real Headaches- choker necklace to keep the blood in the lower body Headaches- Stick head in bucket of mosquitos as itching releases chemicals to stop pain Coughing- Inhale gasoline to kill viruses Coughing- Deep throating objects stops the gag reflex that induces cough Coughing- Back exercises to build diaphragm muscles Cavities- Well, they've already used mercury for that Penile dysfunction- Anal air injection inflates penis muscle Penile dysfunction- Wrap in bug zappers to stimulate nerves Infertility- Eat 3 eggs a day between menstrual cycle Hair loss- Cleanse with red wine as polyphenols regenerates follicles Hair loss- Grow the hair out and put in ponytail to pull scalp muscles closer to the follicles killamch89 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Blackangel Posted June 29, 2021 Share Posted June 29, 2021 Cold - building snowmen causes a cold because they're cold and they want you to be cold. Hemorrhoids - Gum that you swallowed as a child that has grown into the skin. You were warned that gum never comes out. Dizziness - The earth is spinning too fast. Me - The universe decided to give the world a big FUCK YOU! killamch89 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality vs Adventure Posted June 29, 2021 Share Posted June 29, 2021 Oh I see, you want what CAUSED ailments, not cures Chickenpox- sex with featherless dead chicken Headache- lack of sushi in diet which coats brain nerves with massage fish oil Cough- the wind is contaminated with space dust Gas- bubbles in milk Toothache- bacteria colonies are at war with each other Pink eye- vagina spiders Sore throat- brain stem sinking from weight due to barometric pressure High blood pressure= body hair is clogging arteries Diarrhea- intestinal cells having menstruation killamch89 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killamch89 Posted June 30, 2021 Author Share Posted June 30, 2021 Headache - bungie jumping but the cord snapped hitting their head pretty hard in the process. Pink eye - semen shot gone astray, gets in the eye and it turns out the guy has Gonorrhea. Toothache - trying to eat Popeye's biscuits - turns out the ingredients are the same as a cinder block Gas - trying to suck up more soda through a straw out of an empty cup because they wanted to savor every last drop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality vs Adventure Posted June 30, 2021 Share Posted June 30, 2021 Bad breath- intestinal gas vacuumed through esophagus due to hot air being less dense and rises upwards Ear ache- wax is trapping steam each time you get angry Runny nose- waste from brain worms Dandruff- too much fermentation in the body causing alcohols to dry skin Acne- increased temperature causes miniature volcanic like eruptions on skin, releases white fire retardant substance Stomach ache- stomach acid breaks down protein into sulfuric acid and reacts with water to boil and splash inside stomach Joint pain- the rubbing of bone creates fire that burns the nerves Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killamch89 Posted July 1, 2021 Author Share Posted July 1, 2021 9 hours ago, Reality vs Adventure said: Bad breath- intestinal gas vacuumed through esophagus due to hot air being less dense and rises upwards Ear ache- wax is trapping steam each time you get angry Runny nose- waste from brain worms Dandruff- too much fermentation in the body causing alcohols to dry skin Acne- increased temperature causes miniature volcanic like eruptions on skin, releases white fire retardant substance Stomach ache- stomach acid breaks down protein into sulfuric acid and reacts with water to boil and splash inside stomach Joint pain- the rubbing of bone creates fire that burns the nerves The joint pain one made me spit out my soda just now 🤣🤣🤣💀 Reality vs Adventure 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality vs Adventure Posted July 5, 2021 Share Posted July 5, 2021 Insomnia- eyes need open air to cool them Carpal tunnel- the brain/hand puppet network broke strings Diabetes- all the sugar rots in the crack Foot odor- natural ability to prevent feet licking Common cold- body is going through an insect’s spirit possession Fever- the need to hoard something Anxiety- pooped your pants and trying to hide it killamch89 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killamch89 Posted July 5, 2021 Author Share Posted July 5, 2021 19 hours ago, Reality vs Adventure said: Insomnia- eyes need open air to cool them Carpal tunnel- the brain/hand puppet network broke strings Diabetes- all the sugar rots in the crack Foot odor- natural ability to prevent feet licking Common cold- body is going through an insect’s spirit possession Fever- the need to hoard something Anxiety- pooped your pants and trying to hide it To be fair, I'd have had anxiety if I did poop my pants in public 🤣🤣🤣 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality vs Adventure Posted July 9, 2021 Share Posted July 9, 2021 Hair loss-UV radiation Excessive sweating- The air has more salt than your body and pulls your fluids out Yeast infection- body trying to produce alcohol on fridays Genital warts- too many fist bumps Hairy ass- wiping ass on the bush Shortness of breath- The oxygen is higher up then you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killamch89 Posted July 12, 2021 Author Share Posted July 12, 2021 On 7/8/2021 at 10:23 PM, Reality vs Adventure said: Hair loss-UV radiation Excessive sweating- The air has more salt than your body and pulls your fluids out Yeast infection- body trying to produce alcohol on fridays Genital warts- too many fist bumps Hairy ass- wiping ass on the bush Shortness of breath- The oxygen is higher up then you To be fair, excessive UV radiation has been shown to cause hair loss but the genital warts one is hilarious! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
